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  • Tip Bones

It is rightly said that the way in which information is shared with someone is as important as the information itself. Many a times great ideas lose their impact because of the way in which they were conveyed. A bunch of studies conducted both in the lab and on real-world election data, show that we are more likely to vote for political candidates who have deeper voices. So what is it that makes somebody more liked, more trustworthy and taken more seriously just by the way he/she speaks?

Famous business man and speaker Julian Treasure in his famous TED talk " How to speak so that people want to listen" talks of "seven deadly sins" of speaking and how to avoid them:

Gossip- Talking about somebody in their absence automatically makes you less trustworthy. It makes you look plain envious and uninteresting. Talking about somebody doesn't make the person look good/bad but how much they are able to affect you.

Judging- Here your body language and expression also come into consideration along with the way you speak. Being inflexible about an idea without no particular reason makes you look extremely negative and people would not want to associate and share their thoughts with you.

Negativity- This is one of the most important points. Understanding things in the wrong way, saying things with a hurtful intention, all of this not only makes the person in front of you fell bad but adds up to your negativity. Always try to react positively to an ambiguous statement. Many a times people come across as mean and hateful because they always misunderstand statements and get defensive.

Complaining- Rewires your Brain for Negativity, Pessimism, and Unhappiness. Human brain loves familiarity and efficiency- so what you feed your brain it will settle for it and seek more of it. In other words, the more you complain, the more you make this the default mode of your brain's operation.

Excuses- Now in a work environment, this is definitely the worst. Coming up with reasons for why you "CAN'T" do something instead of trying to spend your  time looking for effective solutions will make people question your work ethics and this is really bad for your growth.

Exaggeration- Now this is (I'm sorry to break it to you) the most easy to spot. Exaggeration is literally contagious. One person complains about their life or how much school work they have or how tired they are and then people start using exaggeration statements almost to compete over how bad/good things are. Exaggeration inevitably leads to lying and we don't want to sound like a liar.

Dogmatism- Dictionary meaning of dogmatism is the tendency to lay down principles as undeniably true, without consideration of evidence or the opinions of others. Now this is a very common problem with a lot of people. We tend to think that whatever we have been taught, whatever we think is right and sometimes whatever works for us is the plain truth and anything otherwise is wrong. Now this makes you look very inflexible and very inexperienced. People don't bother having intellectual conversations with you as they don't sense a scope of understanding and learning from you.

So these were some things we're meant to avoid to be an effective and liked speaker. There are also some principles that we can follow that help us even more.

Confidence- According to a study “A highly confident speaker is viewed as being more accurate, competent, credible, intelligent, knowledgeable, likable, and believable than the less confident uncertain speaker.”When it comes to public speaking, confidence is key (not the only key mind you). When speaking in public, it’s only natural to be nervous.In fact, Mark Twain once said, “There are only two types of speakers in the world. 1. The nervous and 2. The Liars.”

There are two main antidotes for anxiety

Excitement – If you’re truly excited about your subject, that feeling will shine through any nervousness you may have while you are giving your presentation.  Studies show that people who label their anxiety as excitement end up feeling more comfortable speaking.

Authenticity – Be yourself. If you have to deviate a little from your meticulously written presentation, do so! Although you should practice your speech as often as possible, you don’t want to memorize it! Memorizing a speech can cause you to fumble over a section if you didn’t say it just right. To excel at public speaking you must do more than just defeat your nervous jitters. You must also have confidence in your subject and be yourself while you are on stage. Passion In order to really communicate to people through speech, you need to have passion about your subject. Without passion, your speech is meaningless. You need to exude a level of sincerity in your emotion when communicating to your audience if you want them to be moved by your presentation. There’s no need to attempt to ‘practice’ sincerity by practicing your speech with a raised voice and waving arms. Simply focus on how you feel about your top and those that you are communicating with. Be Yourself You don’t have to be someone else on stage, all you have to do is just be yourself. Sometimes, no matter how much you believe in your message or how well you’ve rehearsed, if you don’t act like yourself in front of the group, your audience may view your speech as insincere or calculated. Voice Modulations If you want to be more engaging as a speaker, then avoid talking in a tone that seems too well rehearsed, but you still want to take the speed and inflection of your delivery into account when you practice your speech.To practice proper cadence, record yourself giving your speech and listen to it later. You’ll be able to tell exactly when and where you start to sound inauthentic.You can still use effective voice modulations while employing your natural voice. In conclusion, our ability to put our thoughts into words is one of the most valuable gift we have. Make sure to use it in a way that it makes an impact on the people around you.