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Is being a beggar better ?

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Hi, thanks for providing some of your valuable time to me.You must be great people. This is my first bit of creative writing of any order. The reason being, I remain busy the whole day completing the shitload of work i have. Even if sometimes I get a chance for myself, I spend that time drunk. But this week is an odd one, I skipped all kinds of work for a reason I'll mention later in the blog. So finally today, instead of drinking I thought it would be better if I do a bit of progressive keep me remembered in the future, somehow. One of the main reasons for writing this blog is that the last week was... interesting.


So yeah, let me begin by revealing my occupation. I’m a student during daytime but a vigilante by night! Not a typical vigilante you would expect but kind of. Basically, I clean up people’s shit, literally. I’m a sewage cleaner.


This might be confusing but yeah, I’m also a student. I'll keep explaining with the stories flow because everything explained now will just kill the interest, basic writing rules.


Coming to the beginning of last week, similar to the 365 days of a year, I woke up in hostel. I had been fortunate enough to get education but that is a story for another day. In short, I studied hard, day and night, and somehow made a place for myself. Here I wake up, go to the canteen and eat in the corner sitting by myself. I never ever attend a party or even skip college functions, the cause being, I don’t have a typical friend circle due to a mistake I made by revealing my job, caste and age, biggest one being the last one. Mostly, I don’t have problem with it because I feel great when I’m left alone by myself but you know, sometimes you require friends, some form of human connection considering we’re social animals.Sometimes, I just can’t ignore this… feeling of pure loneliness.


It isn’t that I’m a person who is a gone case whom everyone ignores, I do have friends back home. Its just my social status which is the leading cause of my exclusion from these so called ‘loyal friend groups’.Around 3 o’clock when my college hours come to an end, I come back to hostel and get ready for the work that provides me living. Around 6 o’clock I leave for my work.


On the way, everyday, I notice this beggar whose name I assume is Som, looking at me tirelessly without feeling any of the awkwardness felt by a normal person. Every single day, when I go to my personal expedition, this person keeps looking at me. Just last month I tried to get in a conversation with him and… he ignored me.


On 19th of March, similar to what I do everyday, I began my day, ended it and as the clock struck 6, I was on my way to hell. On the way, I saw him sitting there and paid no heed to him as I always do, just proceeded. I reached my destination. Today was going to be a tough day. Today was the day I was expected to jump in a storm drain.In developed countries such as Japan, US and many, people who do our works are provided with training, drills and most importantly equipment. But in my golden bird (India) we have none of it. Equipment too are just for show i.e. 1 for 40 ‘people’.


So we took on the responsibility and made some rules that are needed to be followed. Following are the rules :


1. Forget death


2. Picturie your family


3. Think of what happens if we don’t do this


4. Drink a bottle of alcohol that intoxicates the most


5. Make the fear f*#k off and jump right into cleaning the shit


I followed all of them and jumped right into my work. To get away with it, I try to enjoy myself in there. Take dips in liters of shit, dance like no one is seeing because no one is and just… enjoy the moment.


After I was done with it, the time had come for me to get back on earth which seemed more like heaven to me at the moment. My friends were helping me out and to my surprise, the beggar Som came there too. He helped me get out of the shit hole. I thanked him and he returned the favor by putting me in mere confusion. After helping me out, he just left.For the next three days I didn’t see him sitting there at his daily place. He helped me out of the storm drain but with it left me perplexed.


Last week too he wasn’t there. But when I reached the place of my work, I saw him. He smiled at me. It seemed he had been waiting for me. After I was done with my work which wasn’t much today, I went to him. And for the first time we had a chat.


Me


What’s up man? Didn’t see you for a long time.


Som


Yeah, I wasn’t doing well


Me


So how r u now?


Som


Great


After an awkward silence, I spoke.


Me


There is this simple question I'm having, what makes me so intriguing that you keep looking at me.


Som

(smiled)

Its not just you, it’s the connection between your and mine occupation that intrigues me.


Me


Well I think, there’s none.


Som


There is.


I looked at him for a sec.


Me


If you say so, might even be but what is it.


Som


Similarities between your and mine, and also the differences.


I thought for a second and spoke.


Me


Yeah, just one, both of us don’t get any respect from the society


Som


Hmm… even though you don’t get it, you sure shot deserve it.


Me


Thanks man but what is the point you’re wanting to make here.


Som


Let it all come out then,


Similarities


• We both don’t get respect even though one of us deserves it.


• The amount of money we earn is approx. same, I guess


• We both don’t care about our lives


• Our families push us to do this


Differences


• You deserve respect


• I'm a parasite while you are the reason I’m alive


• My job is one of the easiest ones to do whereas yours is life threatening


• Out of many, you chose this job because your forefathers had done it


• I calculated and found that even with all these facts I earn more than you even though with a little margin


Conclusion


I think, even though your job is a public service, the public will never return your favors which will in turn leave you dissatisfied. Even your wages will be stagnant for life whereas mine might grow. You must have heard of rich beggars but never of rich sewage cleaners or even decent. I guess if you don’t have any option and if you don’t mind you may try a chance in my occupation. I do have connections, some riches decide a person and provide only him with money. I’ll help you in this field. You’ll feel bad at first but with time you’ll get used to it. I’m telling you this because seeing you do all this work makes me care for you. I just want to help you. I feel,… begging is better than what you do.


He spoke this to me, gave me his phone number and was leaving. I felt a thousand things , at an instant I thought he was wrong and at another I thought what he was telling made sense, and also that I had wasted '55' years of my life doing this pile of shit. The 2nd thought was dominating, this made me furious, very angry. I was holding a knife of special kind in my right hand that I had used to clean your shit. I made a hold of it, took steps towards Som and I killed him.


Right now, I’m here in jail writing this on two three sheets of paper, hoping that this might get published so that you get to know my side of the story. I don’t exactly know why killed him, the albatross. Now, I don’t even regret it because I think it was his fault for reminding me that I had wasted my whole life for something I won’t ever get valued for.They think that its my duty to clean their shit and if I don’t, that’s a crime because I was born to do it, duty of an outcast. It isn’t justified if at the end of your life, you realize it had such a purpose for which no one ever cared for.


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